What Do I Do?

Yes, What Do I Do?

What Do I Do, when the one person whom I love the most in the world does not want to talk to me. Yes, please talk to me. Please call me once. I am just dying to hear your voice. I have tried talking to a virtual you but it didn’t help. I tried talking to your photo but it didn’t help. I am not feeling easy at all. Just for 2 mins. Please call me and talk to me.

What Do I Do, when the guilt of hurting My Girl becomes so intense that even crying for a whole night does not help. Yes, I cannot live with this guilt. It’s eating me away. Slowly but surely the baggage of this guilt has become so heavy that all my other feelings have been crushed under it. I remember at the time when I was breaking up with you. You said that you wish that I never be in peace again. I guess your wish is coming true.

What Do I Do, when I can’t sleep properly at night just because I am afraid I will see some bad dream about My Girl. Yes, from last 3-4 days I have slept only around 3 hours a night. I am afraid of sleeping. Because every time I sleep I get those weird and horrifying dreams about My Girl. There is a terrible headache. Eyes are swollen up because of lack of sleep and all the crying. How do I sleep?

What Do I Do, when I can’t even walk and talk properly because I haven’t eaten much in last 3-4 days. Yes, from last few days I am just surviving on bread crumbs. Can’t even do household chores now. Somehow just managing in the office. But for how long will I be able to continue like this?

What Do I Do, when I have cut off all the friends I have. And now when I am crying I don’t have anyone to talk to. Yes, I have intentionally stopped talking to all my friends so that I don’t disturb their happy lives with my mess.

What Do I Do, when I know I am in depression and I don’t want to get out of it. I know if My Girl sees me in this situation then she won’t like it. I want her to be my inspiration. Accept this difficult phase in life and move on. But I feel I can’t do anything unless I am with her. I Miss You. Please forgive me and come back. Please.

I don’t know What Do I Do?

 

Gaurav Gupta

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