Diary Entry 23.07.2017

I can’t seem to get these lines of a song out of my head.

When I close my eyes. You’re here by my side
Oh, when I close my eyes. You’re here by my side.

All I ever really need is your love. Nothing I could say would ever be enough.

Stay a little longer with me, baby! Won’t you stay a little longer with me!

Though I am happy most of the time as I don’t require her to be physically present with me. I can love her without her being with me. But sometimes I become so weak and my resolve just breaks. All I want to do is tell her how I feel. The lines from song tell exactly how I feel.

In those weak moments, you become my Saviour dear diary. Thank you for helping me keep my promise 🙂

 

Gaurav Gupta

 

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What do I want to do

What do I want to do is lay my head in your lap and sleep like a child. Because with you I feel safe, I feel everything is alright.

What do I want to do is play with hairs for hours. They are perfect just like you.

What do I want to do is lay with you under open sky counting stars and talking my heart out. Because with you I can be myself.

What do I want to do is to know you more. I want to spend rest of my breaths unravelling the mystery that is you.

What do I want to do is not to share you with anyone. I want to spend all my time with you because one life time is not enough.

What do I want to do is live this adventure called life with you. Together Forever. ❤

My Girl, I Love You and I need you. ❤ Please come back.

 

Gaurav Gupta

 

One More Time

One More Time I want to See you, to look into those eyes and be lost in them. Want my knees to go weak at your first glance. Want you to see me for who I am. Want to See you.

One More Time I want to Feel you, to touch your soul. To be your whole. To feel the warmth and compassion you have for me. To feel what it likes to be. Want to Feel you.

One More Time I want to Hug you, to bug you. Never want you to leave. Be in my arms always and that hug to never end 🙂 Want to Hug you.

One More Time I want to Love you.

One More Time I want us to be Together, One More Time I want it to be Forever.

One More Time I want to be Not Alone, One More Time I want it to be Regrown.

Can I have that One More Time?

 

Gaurav Gupta

I LOVE You, My Girl

Oh, MY Girl, I LOVE You. You make me smile
Oh, MY Girl, I LOVE You. You make me happy
Oh, MY Girl, I LOVE You. I want to write the poem for you.
Which I don’t know how to do.

Sorry for the lack of rhythm or analogies or metaphors in this poem, which will blow your mind away.
This poem or lack of poem is my way to tell you that I love you.
I will Love you till the end of my time on this planet.

Your smile makes me smile, your tears make me cry.
Your acceptance makes me mad, Your ignorance made me sad.

Oh, My Girl My Girl doesn’t leave me now.
Come back to me and let us take a vow.

We will be always together no matter what happens,
will lift each other up when one of us is dampened

Oh, I Love you ❤   I Love You ❤  I Love You ❤

Forever yours

 

Gaurav Gupta

Monster – That I am

Slowly, piece by piece, you gave yourself to me. And I — a monster, dressed with smile — accepted you.

You carried your flaws with grace around me, after all, you believed I outshined them. You felt safe around me. Holding my hand, resting your head on my shoulder, it gave you the comfort you always dreamed of. You let me turn your cold heart warm. And you let me explore those dreamy lips, too, whilst you smiled and breathed heavily. And between all the choices you had, you decided to choose me, after all, I made you not think about any other choice.
What you and I shared, the long talks, the never-ending kisses, exploring our ‘wanderland’, were simple, adorable things. But along the way, somewhere, they meant a world to both of us, and they will be one of the moments that rewind in front of my eyes before I rest in peace.

And I was lucky, you know? To have a forever. To make all those experiences with you.
And I loved you, truly. I did. Maybe, I still do, deep down, but you don’t be bothered, because I am cold, like you. And, I don’t trust love anymore. How can I? It is something that is there one second, alive and spreading happiness and the other… it just fades away. Absent. Gone. Taking away all those happy moments. Happiness.

Being in love with you is to know that I have to cherish our memories, every moment. And knowing, what I’ll with you, it is something I can’t have with anyone.

Maybe you were just a piece of this jigsaw puzzle, I couldn’t understand. Or you were just the puzzle I could never complete, or lost its pieces. And honestly, I am thankful to be a part of your world. Even if I can’t be a part of it anymore, I will just look at you from a distance.

Remember the letters? Somewhere, I filled it with longer, lasting posts, and hoped one day, I would pass it on to our kids. Well, that is a hope not coming true. A tale for another time.

I know you don’t believe me, but still I love to write to you, about you and hoping I struck a chord, in the end, is the best part, you know? But most importantly, I just stand by the door to my heart, waiting for you to knock one more time, so I can peep out, and let your face sink in, once again.

The Monster – That I am. I ruined everything.

 

Gaurav Gupta

Some Times

Some Times, I just imagine you. A beautiful aura inside my head. At Times when I am sad, I see you in people, I try to hear you in a song, and I feel you in the wind as it brushes my hair, and I look at the empty sky.

Some Times, well most of the times, I wonder what went wrong? What separated us into you and me, two different souls. Once inseparable, and now parallel to each other. Never going to end up, together.

Some Times, I write about you. Some Times I write to you, hoping you still read my words, and not scroll down reading my name. I wonder if at all it moves you from the inside, because it moves me, every time. Wonder if you know these are just not fiction, but for you.

Some Times, I wonder, what it would have been? If we would have been together? If all had been worked out by us.

Some Times, I just want to give up. To be gone. To be left alone. To set me free. Isn’t that a good thing? Being myself for once? But I wonder, will I be complete without you?

But I know, someday you will be back, and that’s when I have to be there for you. So Some Times, I just think about those happy days, when we will be together, yet again.

 

P.S – This poem is dedicated to My Girl.

 

Gaurav Gupta